God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize