Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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