Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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