I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
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