just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
