would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
is it fun? or sober?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
