you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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