So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
