I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Randomize
