and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
