i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
