is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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