I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize