the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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