ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
