I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
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