Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
