Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
