some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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