tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize