Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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