He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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