i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Randomize