like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
