I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
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