That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Did we literally take a cab across the street
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
