You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize