My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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