Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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