i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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