I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Buhtt sex?
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
