I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
