I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
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