I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Randomize
