my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
