Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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