i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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