k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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