it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
