Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
