It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
How drunk are you?
Completed.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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