Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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