I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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