PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
