I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
