he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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