somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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