ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
