I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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