Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
another moral hangover. fuck.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
