I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
