This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
