Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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